


Shelter Me from the Cold

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Meihem [1]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Memories, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-20 18:11:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16560776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: Mei is still haunted by what happened in Antarctica, but with Junkrat she might have found a shelter from the nightmares.





	Shelter Me from the Cold

   _Junkrat frowned as the soft sound of thunder broke into his dream, the sound out of place as he was currently sprawled on the beach, laid out beneath a clear blue sky. He scowled, searching for clouds as the sound rumbled again and unable to see anything, he rolled over and buried his face into his towel, hoping that if he ignored it long enough it would move away. However, the sound was persistent and growing louder and more frequent, and eventually he gave up, bolting up with a frustrated growl…_

Only to find himself sitting bolt upright in bed, safe and secure in his own room at the Watchpoint and he blinked confused, trying to reconcile his dream with reality and it took him a moment longer to realise that the thunder wasn’t thunder but someone knocking frantically on his bedroom door. Swiping the sleep from his eyes he glanced across at the clock, grumbling under his breath as he realised that it was barely past two in the morning and he was seriously debating just ignoring whoever was at the door and trying to get back to sleep. They had been up late as it was, Winston calling them for an emergency briefing even though only a few of them were being dispatched for the time being, and it had been close to midnight when he had finally stumbled into bed.

    However, as much as he wanted to ignore it, something made him hesitate. Maybe it was the fact that as Angela had commented a few weeks ago, he was becoming more team-orientated or more likely, it was the fact that he knew there were very few people who would venture down to his bedroom. In fact, outside of an emergency, the only ones that would willing come to his room were Mako and Mei, and the former had learnt the hard way that Junkrat liked his sleep. Still, the possibility that it could be either of them was enough to stifle his irritation for the time being, although he still grumbled under his breath as he began to push the covers away, shivering as he was exposed to the chilly Gibraltar air.

“Who’s there?!” He demanded, making no effort to hide his irritation as he reached for his prosthetic leg which was carefully stored within arm’s reach of the bed. There had been a time when he had slept with it on, refusing to let himself be caught without out, something that he had been scolded for after Angela had seen the state of his stumps, but still it had taken time for him to feel comfortable sleeping without it. And it was still only here, in the Watchpoint and surrounded by people who had earnt his trust that he felt safe enough to let himself be that vulnerable.

    He worked as quickly as he could to slide the clunky limb into place and clip it into position, however, the task was made doubly hard not only by the shivers still wracking him, but also by the fact that he was working one-handed. He couldn’t be bothered to attach his arm as well, especially as he hoped that the disturbance would be quickly resolved and then he could get straight back to sleep. It was only as he slipped the last clasp into place that he realised that he hadn’t received an answer, and that the soft thunder of the knocking had stopped too. “Oi!” He called again, more stridently this time, listening intently for a response and after a moment he was rewarded by the sound of movement on the other side of the door, followed by a quiet, tentative knock.

    Frustrated by the lack of verbal response, even he had more manners that that…most of the time, anyway… he pushed himself to his feet, stumbling for a moment as he caught his bearings, adjusting to the familiar weight and pressure of the metal limb before lurching towards the door. He knocked a pile of junk over in the process and he cursed under his breath, knowing that he would forget about it by morning and probably end up falling over it. When he reached the door he nearly wrenched it off its hinges in his hurry to snap at whoever had decided to play silly games at his door at this time of night, however, the words died on the tip of his tongue and he came up short as he found Mei standing in front of him. “Mei?” He asked, what remained of his irritation draining away as he got a good luck at her.

     She was shivering, which was an unusual occurrence as she loved the cold, something that he had never managed to understand. Although he couldn’t complain as it gave him free rein to steal her coat when they were out and about, something that always made her giggle. However, as he glanced down the shivering made more sense as he realised that she wasn’t wearing her beloved yeti slippers, her bare feet pale against the metal floor, almost as though she hadn’t taken the time to dress properly. A suspicion that was supported by the thin pyjamas she wore, rather than the fluffy dressing gown she usually wore. She might not usually feel the cold, but she liked soft fluffy clothing. However, it was her expression that gave him the most concern, because there was a haunted look in her eyes that he had seen before although not for a while and not this bad, and the redness around them told him that she had been weeping at some point and she looked as though she might cry again if he said or did the wrong thing.

     She was also silent, still not having said a word even in greeting and she was staring at him as though he had all the answers. He floundered under her gaze for a moment, because normally he was the one seeking her out for answers, usually to regret it later when she went off into a scientific spiel that had him lost after the first few words. He also couldn’t recall a time when she hadn’t had something to say to him, even if had only been a sharp retort or a thinly veiled insult. The silence was unnerving, and unable to bear it any long he took a hobbling step forward, softening his voice this time as he tried to draw a response from her. “Snowdrop?” Usually using a silly pet name like that would have earnt him a glare or even an elbow to the side, depending on just how ridiculous he was being and whether she was busy or not, but today she seemed to waver at the nickname before her expression crumpled completely.

    Junkrat barely had time to register the sob that shook her before she was stumbling forward, and he hastily braced himself for the impact, lifting his arm in invitation. It was one she accepted, sobbing in earnest by the time she slammed into him and he quickly wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer whilst glancing down the corridor. It didn’t seem like any of the others were awake at this hour, but he knew that she wouldn’t want anyone else to see her like this, and part of him didn’t want anyone else to see this either, and quietly he guided her back into the sanctuary of his room, just managing to kick the door shut behind them.

    He’d half expected her to pull away now that they were in private, but instead she clung tighter and he frowned. It wasn’t the first time this had happened, although it had been a while since he had seen her as bad as this. Still, he knew what to do and squeezing her shoulders lightly he led her forwards towards his bed, carefully guiding her through the maze of junk on the floor and praying that she wouldn’t notice the blueprints to the new explosive he was working on. The silence felt more profound now, and he missed the way that she would normally be scolding him over the state of his room, remembering the time they had nearly come to blows when she had snuck inside and tried to install an organised storage system into his room.

    Today she was completely silent apart from the sobs that she was muffling against his shoulder, and his arm tightened protectively as he guided her the last few steps to the bed. She was malleable in his grasp as he pushed her gently down onto the bed and he scowled, not liking the change. He was reluctant to let go of her, sensing that she needed the contact more than normal, but he needed his other arm for this and slowly he pulled back, unsurprised when she immediately flinched at the loss of contact. Finally, she lifted her head to look at him, affording him a clear view of the tears trickling down her cheeks, hurt lingering beneath the haunted expression.

   It made it harder to pull back the last little bit and he tried his best to hold her gaze, fumbling as he reached for his other prosthetic and biting back a curse as he managed to knock it off the table, only just managing to grab it before it could hit the floor. He still hesitated before pulling it closer, as it had taken him a long time to become comfortable with doing this around anyone beside Mako, and even that had been simply out of necessity. It had been even harder to do it around Mei, but it was hard to be self-conscious today, especially when he wanted nothing more to hold her properly as he watched more tears trickling down her cheeks.

He wanted to hold her close.

     He might never admit it aloud, but often it had been the one thing that he’d wanted when the world had gone to hell around him, and he was determined that she would have what he hadn’t been able to have. Especially as he knew that whatever nightmare or memory had driven her from her bed tonight would be related to her isolation at the Ecopoint, to the loneliness that it had taken her a long time to escape. It was that knowledge which got him to move, awkwardly trying to fix the arm into place and at some point, he must’ve looked away from her, because he jolted when after a long couple of minutes of fumbling with the connection he felt trembling fingers brushing against the upper part of his arm.

  The touch was gentle, a quiet request for permission to help and with a lump in his throat he nodded, unable to bring himself to look up as the fingers glided lower before moving to help him. Together they slid the limb into place, Mei’s fingers massaging soothingly as the connections fired up, making his arm twitch and he bit the inside of his lip. It was still instinct to want to pull away, but he remained where he was and when he risked a glance upwards he was glad that he had, because Mei’s gaze was focused on his arm and what she was doing, the focus driving some of the haunted look from her eyes.

“Thank you,” he mumbled, feeling awkward when it was firmly attached, but it was worth it to see her lips quirk into the faintest of smiles although it was short lived.

      Now, he could do what he’d wanted to do from the start and rising stiffly from his crouched position in front of her, he moved to sit beside her on the bed, leaning over and wrapping both arms around her and pulling her into a hug. The gentle embrace shattered what little control she’d managed to regain over her emotions, and she let out a hiccupping sob before twisting and burying her face against his shoulder once more. He didn’t say anything. He knew from experience that she needed this release before she would be able to tell him what had driven her from her bed, and before she would be able to hear his words. She had reluctantly admitted once before, it was because before she had never truly been able to give herself the time to grieve for what had happened to her or mourn her team because she’d had to focus on survival.

Now, he gave her that time.

    He gently eased them both further onto the bed, scooting backwards until he could lean against the wall and let her curl in his lap, reaching up to run his human fingers through her hair. He had never been with silence though, and after a couple of minutes he began to hum, some half-forgotten song from his childhood, more noise than words, as he waited for her to cry herself out.

    Minutes passed, and gradually he felt her beginning to still, although she made no effort to pull away from him, her fingers tightening against him. Her grip was just beginning to border on painful, and he was about to protest when she finally broke her silence. “I couldn’t get out…” Despite their proximity it was hard to make out her words as they were muffled against him, and it took him a moment to decipher what she was trying to say, a lead weight sinking into the pit of his stomach as he realised what she’d said.

  _That nightmare…_

    It was one of the most frequent nightmares that plagued her, and he could still remember the night he’d woken to the sound her screaming in her sleep. They had been sharing a tent on a mission, and part of it had collapsed during the night and she had become trapped in the folds, reality bleeding into the dream world, leaving her feeling like she was back in the narrow confines of the cryo-chamber and unable to escape as she fought against the tent and only ended up more entangled. Junkrat had never been able to forget the terror in those screams, and how broken she had sounded as she had pleaded to be let out, his name slipping out amongst those of her old teammates… Suddenly worried that his tight hold might be hindering rather helping he made to pull back, only to find her hands darting up and holding his arms in place. “Don’t!”

“Snowdrop?”

“You’re warm…” She whispered, finally lifting her head to look at him and whilst her face was a blotchy mess, her eyes red and swollen from weeping, her eyes were beginning to clear again. “It was so cold…so, so cold in there.” She was shivering again, and even though he knew it was from the memory rather than the actual temperature he reached around her, groping around for the covers and pulling them up around her. “Thank you.” Junkrat nodded, not needing the thank you but accepting it as he let his head fall to rest against her head. He knew that there was more to the nightmare, more that she hadn’t said, but he didn’t know how to draw the details out of her. He wasn’t good with words, it was why the misunderstandings between them had endured for so long, and he was reluctant to risk saying the wrong thing when she was finally talking.

     They remained like that for a few minutes, Mei slowly relaxing against him, one hand falling away to grasp the covers and tug them closer and he could feel her breathing beginning to ease out and he started when she pulled back abruptly. “Jamieson…” He tensed at the use of his full name, as generally she only called him that when he was in trouble…which was most of the time, as he couldn’t stop pushing boundaries and seeing how far rules and her patience would bend, but her tone said that wasn’t the case here. Instead she sounded almost hesitant, her fingers twisting with the edge of the colour as she carefully avoided meeting his gaze and after a moment of that he reached out and gently settled his hand on top of hers, stilling the fidgeting.

“What is it?” He bit back the nickname this time, sensing that it wasn’t the time for it. Mei seemed a little startled by the serious response, and he couldn’t stop his lips from twitching as she blinked at him. “Mei…?”

“You know what you asked me before….?”

     Junkrat wracked his brain. There were a lot of things he had asked her before, some serious, most less so. She had banished him from her lab before because he would sit there and just pester her with increasingly nonsensical questions. His confusion must have been evident in his expression, because she sighed, colour flooding her cheeks as she glanced down. “About me…staying here more often…?” She whispered, trailing off at the end and for a moment he was certain that his mind must just have short-circuited. It had been a few weeks since he had last brought that subject up, pointing out how silly it was for them to stay in separate rooms when they had little enough time together on the base. However, he hadn’t been that surprised that she wanted to wait, even if nights like this, when she would seek him out as shelter against the nightmares had been becoming more common as she came to trust him more.

“Yeah.” He nodded, not sure where she was going with this and trying to quash the flicker of hope that was trying to rise in his chest.

“I…” She swallowed hard, before twisting and moving so that she was crouched over his legs and facing him, her face pinker than before. “I want to try it.”

“Are you sure?” You…” _Don’t have to_ , was on the tip of his tongue but he was silenced by the sight of her shaking her head and he fell silent.

“When I woke up and you weren’t there…” She shivered again, the sensation making its way up his legs and he reached for her hands, grasping them once more, giving her something to ground herself with as she took a deep breath. “It was like being back at the Ecopoint and waking up alone...” She sniffled, her eyes too bright, but the tears didn’t fall this time as she added fiercely. “I don’t want to feel like that ever again….”

    Junkrat was silent for a long moment, for the first time in a long while silenced by her words. Part of him wondered if it was more of a need than a want that had her suggesting this, but then she had woken up thinking of him. She had wanted him, and he hadn’t been there…and she had sought him out, whereas in the past she had tried not to share her fears. Realising that she was shifting nervously, waiting for a response he smiled, not his usual wild grin or smirk, but soft. Happy. “There’s always room for you here, Snowdrop,” he whispered, squeezing her hands, before adding with a slight teasing edge. “If you can put up with the junk…” Her expression contorted for a moment, her nose wrinkling up, before she relaxed with a sigh and a slight smile.

“I think I can live with that.”

 

 


End file.
